Sunday, March 9, 2014

Yes, We Can!

(Warning, this is long, and if you don't know me, it might be very boring to you).

It came, and it went.  (I am referring to the dance season, but I am realizing I am talking about childhood as well).
It seems like everything my oldest daughter has done in dance since she was a little girl led up to this one season, the one final competition, and one final dance routine.  I am still in awe at what started with a sweet little girl roaming the house in leotards and taking park and rec dance, has led to a fulfilling development of talent and strong friendships and learning confidence and incredible work ethic and physical stamina.

I had no idea how to maneuver my way around the dance world.  I did know we didn't have a lot of time or money to spend on it.  But I also knew we wanted to make some sacrifices for both of our children to develop their talents.  So she was pretty little when I signed her up for her first dance class through Park and Recs.  I think she did a few sessions there, when we had a new teacher that was in between jobs teaching for the city, and was from one of the top dance schools in the nation that is located here in Minnesota.  I went to pick her up from class and the teacher said to me, "You need to know that your daughter has a gift."  I kind of laughed and said, that yes, she really enjoys dancing.  "She said no, I mean a real gift.  She has natural ability with the way she holds her self and does the dance moves.  She has natural dance lines.  You really need to consider getting her into a dance studio.

What a lovely thing to hear (even if I didn't know what "natural dance lines" were)!  I had no dance experience so this was all new to me.  I did have some reservations with wanting her to wear modest costumes and appropriate lyrics.  We had a friend who worked at a studio nearby, and she became my mentor when we signed up at her studio.  Luckily, I knew how to sew, and she put me to work making assembly line costumes to help pay for the cost.  From there, my daughter went on to be in a musical production that she got the lead in, where we met another dance teacher from our church who got us to go to her studio.  I cannot say enough good about her early teachers that made her believe in herself as a dancer and human being.
 

As she entered middle school, we could not longer afford the classes or time commitment that she was now qualified for.  I have to admit, we were all a little broken hearted over that, but we took that leap of faith in trusting we were doing what was best for our entire family.

When low and behold, she went to junior high and then we learned they have dance teams that compete all the way into the high school level-- I had no idea!  We were so happy to learn that there was a way to continue with this great passion she had.

The caliber of dance at the junior high level was a step-down from the dance studio for sure, but the competitions have some great things about them.  It is very economical, they have a long list of requirements for dance moves, music, and costumes, and she was meeting new friends and learning how to present herself through competitions.

When junior high ended she moved onto the high school team.  The down side for us was that there were girls who danced in studio all of those years, and of course their level was more advanced at that point, so it made it more competitive for her.  She started out on JV, but by Sophomore year, she was on Varsity Kick.  She danced JV Jazz every year, though.








One of the most special parts about all of this is, there were a few girls from the junior high that ended up dancing through high school through all of those years.  And by Freshman year, there were I believe 9 of them that ended up dancing all 4 years together.  These girls were exceptional in my opinion.  They were driven to do well in school, had high goals for college, and they worked so stinkin' hard in dance.  It was a blessing and privilege to have that team to be with.  They got so close because dance is almost year round since they have a fall and winter team and various clinics and practices all summer long.

Through the high school years there some real ups and downs for various reasons.  But they got better and better each year, each having come from different backgrounds.  By their senior year, they had proven themselves to be tough and respected as a team.  We knew that if there was a team to ever make it to state from our school, this was the year, because this was a special set of girls with a great dance, costumes, and theme: "Yes, We Can!"  (It seemed every where we turned, we found little "signs" that this would be their year- even my wool socks for Christmas.)


Then it happened- it was the first meet of the year.  They gave a great performance at the competition.  We were listening to the results be announced, and I thought for sure they MIGHT get 4th place.  We were used to 7th, 4th, maybe a 2nd or 3rd by the end of the season.  But at the first meet against some excellent team, they got 2nd place!  There were tears of joy from coaches, the dancers, the parents.  I never knew what it felt like to win something.  We certainly knew how to lose and be gracious and pick ourselves up afterwards.  It wasn't first place, but my goodness, it was close to it, and they beat a lot of teams!



I remember driving home afterwards and my husband and I were both still so choked up in the car.  All the sacrifices, all the defeats, and the lessons that built "character", all the intense practices for the girls, being the underdogs for so many years--- it all paid off.  There was something special about this particular group of girls.  They did it!

And so the rest of the season marched on.  Then they started winning 1st place.  Several times.  If they didn't win first, they were 2nd.  Every time.  They beat a team that they hadn't beat in 12 years, and had a higher score than a team they had never beat.  They were on fire!  Other dance team members they competed against started coming up to them at meats and telling them they wanted our team to win.  Everyone was sick of the same old teams winning over and over, year after year.  Even the media caught on and started routing for us, the Underdogs.



Section-finals finally came.  They just needed to get 3rd place and they would have a spot to compete at State.  The tension mounted.  The parents were more nervous than the girls.  Would they slip and fall?  Would they crumble under the pressure?  Would they miss a kick?  Well, guess what- they NAILED it!  A nearly perfect performance in my eyes.  They went out and delivered the performance of a life-time.  They danced the dance they needed to dance because they did their personal best.




We sat and listened to the results.  We were in shock... they came in 4th!  Are you kidding?!  They needed 3rd to go to State.  In the bat of an eye, dance was done.  All those years, finished, with no "State-finalist Title".  Come to find out, they had lost by .001%.  UGGGGGGG!! OUCH!!!!  And it was the same 3 teams it's been for maybe 5 years.  Darn it.

Such a disappointment.

In my sadness, I was standing back watching the girls.  They stayed so composed during the announcements.  I wanted to cry, but I didn't.  I was in the bleachers watching the madness after they released all the dancers.  There was so much commotion and mix of emotions.  And then I noticed our little band of girls.... in the middle of the chaos, they were huddled together, just the Seniors.


They were the only girls amongst the thousands of people doing that.  Coming together, crying together, consoling each other.  And then I knew... they didn't get 3rd and they didn't get to State, but they had something very special and life-long-meaningful inside of them.  They had gone through 4 years of dance together and come out very good friends with the understanding of what a real team is. They learned that, "Yes, They Can!"

What Can They Do?

They learned that they can love each other and their sport, they can excel and win more than any other dance team at our school ever had, they can be and were devoted and survived intense work-outs and preparation (even when school was cancelled because of the Polar Vortex and the only place to practice was my basement...)

 that prayer works.....
that they can hold-up under pressure when the stakes are high, that they almost defied the odds, that they are strong...

and that they are loved and supported...

 (Grandma and Grandpa came all the way from Idaho!)


And for some reason, it was okay at that moment that they lost.  Because what they had accomplished, totally outweighed not getting to State.  
Their theme all season-- "Yes We Can". I say-- "Yes, they DID!"  They did SO much!
And it felt crazy to have it all be done.  Final words of the coach sent out that weekend: "Hand in your costumes on Monday!" Crazy!  18 years- finished.

Well, maybe not finished.  Back up to a year a go.  She and I visited some dance classes at BYU where she was hoping to go to college.

And she just found out that she will be going there this summer taking those very dance classes we visited.  She doesn't want to major in it, but I don't know that she can imagine life without a little dancing.  She isn't the prima-ballerina, but she is good and solid and has a light to share with others.

I am so grateful for the ways that dance has enriched our life.  We have learned countless lessons from it.  I know my daughter wished we could have given her more instruction, but in the end, it turned out so much better than what I ever thought possible.  











I am so grateful that our children are given gifts and that they can find their own path of how they will use those gifts.  My other daughter has a special set of talents very different from my oldest, yet no less important.  I see them multiply their ability as they work at it and share it with others.  Just the other night, my youngest shared the Parable of the Talents from the New Testament at a youth function we were at, and she ended it with the reminder that we are not to hide our talents, but share them with others.





Thank you, my daughters, for sharing your talents with others and blessing our lives and the lives of others!  You are brave and talented!  And when life gets hard in the future, don't forget to dance.
 
Little Sister was routing for her this year, one of her Number #1 fans!